GIVING UP THE GOOD FOR THE GREAT

Choices – life is full of them. And once you’ve taken on the mantle of parenting, choices seem to become exponential in number and complexity. As parents we get to decide: 

• Cloth or disposable diapers?
• Homemade or store-bought baby food?
• At home care or daycare in the community?
• Analog or electronic toys?
• Public, private, parochial, or homeschool?
• Allowance or earn spending money?
• Family game night or movie night?
• Visit the grandparents or travel to experience a new place?
• Teens allowed to take public transportation or drive the family car?

We could go on and on – but what came to my attention in this exercise was that my family has opted for both choices in many of these categories! Choices can be nuanced too, and often there are benefits (and drawbacks) to either option. If only there were a clear decision tree that each parent was issued at the birth of their child, giving assurance in each crossroads moment as the child grows. It may not be as clear as many of us would like, but God’s word – the Bible – is certainly a powerful tool to assist in all parenting decisions!

‍Now you likely aren’t going to be schlepping the family Bible with you to the grocery store to help you choose organic vs. standard produce to feed your children, but prayer and consulting the Bible daily will form your parenting philosophy, which shapes your choices.

My people, hear my teaching;

   listen to the words of my mouth.

I will open my mouth with a parable;

   I will utter hidden things, things from of old—

things we have heard and known,

   things our ancestors have told us.

We will not hide them from their descendants;

   we will tell the next generation

the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord,

   his power, and the wonders he has done.

Psalm 78: 1-4 NIV

When I read passages like the one above, I hear God clearly telling me to keep the conversation going with my daughters and others in the next generation. The psalmist is encouraging God’s people to tell stories – to meet children at their level of understanding and share in a way that will illuminate their understanding of God. What stories are you choosing to tell to your children? 

With all the content in the world today, decision fatigue is real. So be encouraged to S - L - O - W down and make time to get with your spouse or accountability partner and PRE-make some decisions for your family according to the info you have now. Write down your key values and your non-negotiables. Decide the standard by which you will contend for as you hold up each choice to the light and make decisions for your family. By clarifying those values ahead of time, you are better equipped to be confident in your selections, in matters both great and small. Determine how you will orient your family’s life – will Jesus be in the center of it all?

‍I heard in a podcast this past week that there is a replacement for the most valuable commodity on earth today. It’s not money or time, but ATTENTION. What you put your attention on will drive your choices for how you spend your time and money. Who you give your attention to will determine the makeup of your community. Jesus’ words in the Sermon on the Mount speaks directly to our attention when He says:

‍But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:33 NIV

‍Jesus isn’t opposed to good things, activities, and opportunities which families often enjoy. God is a good, good Father who gives life-giving things to those who ask Him! But Jesus gently, but firmly nudges us to let go of good things that distract us so we can make a choice for the GREATEST and most deserving of our attention – God and His kingdom! 

Be encouraged, Epic parents! Seek first Jesus and His kingdom, orienting your conversations, stories, time, and attention around God with your children. This act of first choosing what is GREAT will be a sweet offering to God. Our Lord, who is the source of life and love, will provide you the direction and discernment to make choices for all the GOOD things that follow with your kids.

Grace and peace,

Annikki

P.S. I’m personally deeply filled with gratitude for the Epic Families community and how loving this body of Christ has been this month! I shared with parents and the Epic Kids team that my season of leading the Epic Kids Ministry will be wrapping up at the end of this school year, even while I stay in SF and remain at Epic Church as a fellow sister-in-Christ. I’m letting go of this VERY GOOD thing for the GREAT thing ahead to which God is calling me. Thank you for your love and support – I’m blessed and encouraged by this community who is built on the rock that is Jesus!

‍Resources for Parents:

• Good to Great by Jim Collins – principles which are helpful not only in business, but also in our families (each family is an organization)
• Patrick Lencioni: 3 Questions for Frantic Families
• Raising Passionate Jesus Followers by Phil & Diane Comer
• Empowering your kids’ choices – connectedfamilies.org
• Parent guides & conversation kits – axis.org – excellent for facilitating conversations, especially with pre-teens and teenagers (but good for parents to research and discuss before your child reaches those ages)

‍What Epic Kids  are learning in February: 

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