SPRING CLEANING WITH HOSPITALITY

‍If Jesus Came To My House by Joan Gale Thomas was a favorite picture book for a time in our home. My husband and I were regularly hosting people for dinner or playdates and tea, and we were looking to develop positive hospitality habits in our daughters. The simple ink drawings coupled with the lilting rhymes sparked all of our imaginations as we considered the next time we would have friends over to play. My young daughters would play endless dress-up games, setting tea parties or offering toys to the “guest” of the moment (which occasionally was a beloved teddy bear). 

Sometimes there would be lively arguments among my daughters about the manner in which we should host people – the menu, the games, even the parental involvement – but overall, with steady, repeated practice, they developed skills in hosting actual guests in our home. Our goal wasn’t to create little butlers, but instead to inspire our children to value hospitality and learn the graces of kindness and respect toward others, both in our home, and out in the world.

‍Hospitality is a Biblical virtue! We see so many places in scripture where hospitality is extolled as a vital behavior for a Christian.
Be hospitable to one another without complaining. Just as each one has received a gift, use it to serve others, as good stewards of the varied grace of God. If anyone speaks, let it be as one who speaks God’s words; if anyone serves, let it be from the strength God provides, so that God may be glorified through Jesus Christ in everything. To him be the glory and the power forever and ever. Amen.

1 Peter 4:9-11 CSB

Parents, are we taking steps to cultivate hospitality in our homes? Even if you’ve done so in the past, it’s important to keep these skills fresh and current, not growing rusty with disuse. Speaking for my family, over the years of the Covid interruption we grew complacent, allowing hospitality skills to gather dust. It’s time for spring cleaning! An investment in hosting other people in your home is worth the reward of richer relationships and the development of the virtue of hospitality in your children or teens.

‍So how does one sow seeds of hospitality into the soil of our kids’ hearts? Well, start by getting to know that soil – is it sun-baked and hardened? Encrusted with briars or thorns? Rocky? Or loamy and fertile?

Jesus taught, as recorded  in Matthew 13 and Luke 8, through the parable of the sower, which is a good reminder as parents on how to read our children as we sow virtues into them. If we want to reap a healthy crop of virtues in our children, we must cultivate the soil, preparing the child to receive the seed – God’s word which is truth in love.

‍Observe your kids as you go throughout your day together – gain a sense of the heart-soil of your son or daughter. 

• Has she built up a wall to you as a parent and is impervious to your words? Perhaps her heart is hardened and needs some watering with love before she is ready to hear God’s word. 
• Is his heart focused on the thorny cares of this world – maybe whether things that money can buy or worries over how he is perceived by those around him? Pruning back and developing gratitude habits for what he does have can help cultivate his heart-soil.
• Is her heart rocky and shallow, where it seems she will receive your coaching, but never seems to go anywhere with it? Fertilize in depth by giving her some of your own soil– perhaps sharing some examples of God’s goodness in your life.
• Are their hearts eager to receive and hear from God’s word? Don’t hold back! Read from the Bible and talk about what you read. Listen to podcasts from trusted sources. Read stories together and talk about the characters and how they grow. Sing together. Dance. Do all these things in LOVE and the harvest will bear much fruit!

‍Don’t grow weary as a parent-gardener! Our kids will cycle through seasons during their development, and their hearts may have any one of these conditions. We must be observant and treat their hearts accordingly. If we keep on gardening faithfully, sowing love and faith in Jesus into our kids, God will handle their growing, and His word never returns void.

Epic parents, I see you and all you are doing for your children. You are loved and have been called worthy to be given a child to raise in this beautiful, complex world! Please know that you are not alone. You have a vibrant, intelligent, loving community surrounding you, helping you get your gardening gloves on, and loaning you the tools to be the best parent you can be! Lean into this Epic Families community – we are better for having you here! 

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Grace and peace,

Annikki

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P.S. Looking for ideas on books you can read with all ages of kids that can help you teach virtues? One resource is Five In A Row – we used this when our kids were little (2-8 years); also check out The Positive Parenting Centre; plus Children’s Book of Virtues and The 7 Habits of Happy Kids – both well-loved in my family!

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What Epic Kids & PreK are learning in March:

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