In the beginning of our lives, we learn so much by imitation. Our first words are spoken simply because we’ve heard our parents say these words to us so often. We watch movies and find ourselves trying to copy our favorite characters. If you were a sports fan growing up, I’m sure you sought to mimic the movements of your heroes.

While imitation is necessary in the early stages of development, it will ultimately hold us back from the life we’ve been designed for.  

The reason for this is simple – if you have been uniquely created for a specific purpose – you won’t be able to achieve that purpose if you’re trying to imitate someone else. How did we become convinced that we should be like everyone else or that we should try to make everyone else just like us? This has led all of us at some point or another to struggle with the great distraction known as comparison.

It makes sense why the comparison game is stronger now than it has ever been in human history. We have more access to the lives of other people than we’ve ever had before. Thanks to social media, you no longer have to wonder how you stack up against every other person on the planet. You simply have to follow them and see what they have that you don’t have, where they’ve been that you’ll probably never go, and what they’ve accomplished that you can’t even dream of doing.

Or rather than feeling inferior to everyone else, you begin to feel superior to everyone else. You think that they’re missing out because they don’t have what you have, can’t do what you can do, or will never achieve what you have already achieved in your life.

When it comes to the comparison game, you lose even if you win.

Around 1000 BC, the leaders of Israel began to ask the prophet Samuel for a king. They had never had a king before. God claims they had rejected him as their king and had requested a human king. He tells Samuel to anoint Saul as their new king. Over time, Saul gets to know David and becomes very fond of him. He makes David one of his armor-bearers. As you probably know, David goes on to kill Goliath. I want you to watch how quickly Saul’s view of David begins to change. I think this is a profound case study in how comparison causes us to forfeit what God has for us.

1 Samuel 18:5-9 Whatever mission Saul sent him on, David was so successful that Saul gave him a high rank in the army. This pleased all the troops, and Saul’s officers as well. When the men were returning home after David had killed the Philistine, the women came out from all the towns of Israel to meet King Saul with singing and dancing, with joyful songs and with timbrels and lyres. As they danced, they sang: “Saul has slain his thousands, and David his tens of thousands.” Saul was very angry; this refrain displeased him greatly. “They have credited David with tens of thousands,” he thought, “but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom?” And from that time on Saul kept a close eye on David.

How in the world did David go from being Saul’s favorite to becoming the person Saul wanted to kill the most? He had done nothing different from when Saul thought he was the most amazing person ever. The difference that changed everything between these two – and I would argue, that changed the rest of Saul’s life – was Saul realizing he didn’t quite stack up to David. He was good with David as long as he was above David. He even gave him a high ranking in the army, though David was still underneath him.

The women from all the towns come out to meet King Saul with singing and dancing. Notice they begin their song with this line: “Saul has slain his thousands.” The whole point of their song, at least at this point, is to honor Saul. He must have felt good about himself and all he accomplished. The only problem for him is that their song kept going: “…and David his tens of thousands.” Now Saul is no longer content with what he has done or how he is seen by others. He gets very angry, as this comparison displeases him greatly.

By the way, you can never celebrate someone you are jealous of. Saul could have been grateful. He could have been amazed by remembering the lowly place he had come from and all God had done for him. But he was not because he was fixated on the comparison game with David.

Here’s the verse that tells you everything you need to know about how comparison really works: “And from that time on Saul kept a close eye on David” (v.9). He is no longer content with what he’s been given. He is no longer focusing his energies on what God has for his life. Saul becomes obsessed with David from here on out. Comparison destroys what could be present in our lives because it keeps our “close eye” on someone else. Let me ask you a question:

Who are you keeping a close eye on?

There’s nothing wrong with glancing at the lives of others, for at least two good reasons: to cheer them on and to learn from them. But we cannot keep our close eye on someone else’s life and stay focused on the life we’re meant for. I’m not encouraging you towards a self-absorbed life, but I’m absolutely encouraging you to live the one life you were created for. If we aren’t supposed to keep a close eye on everyone else, what should we be keeping a close eye on?

Hebrews 12:1-2 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

We are told to fix our eyes on Jesus – this is the secret to running our race well.

If we are called to throw off everything that hinders in our lives, comparison must be included. It keeps us from loving people well. It doesn’t allow us to be content with who God has made us to be and what he has called us to do. We must run the race marked out for us, not the one given to anyone else. God has graced your life for a specific purpose. You are called to run your race.

Who cares if you win a race God never called you to run?

You will never run the race God has for you as long as you are consumed with the race he has for everyone else.

Comparison removes contentment. It channels your energy and attention away from what matters most. It also causes a lack of gratitude toward the God who has given you so much. I believe John the Baptist is a great example of what it looks like to fight against comparison. Before Jesus had a public ministry, John the Baptist was the most prominent leader when it came to the kingdom of God. When Jesus comes onto the scene, John’s disciples let him know that he has competition. How will John respond to this?

John 3:27-30 To this John replied, “A person can receive only what is given them from heaven. You yourselves can testify that I said, ‘I am not the Messiah but am sent ahead of him.’ The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. He must become greater; I must become less.”

John refuses to play the comparison game. He is content with what God has given him and what he has not given him. Let’s look at the difference between John’s response to Jesus and Saul’s response to David:

John was joyful; Saul was jealous.

John listened with joy for Jesus; Saul kept a close eye on David.

John was content to run his race; Saul missed out on the race God had for him.

John did not want to be the Messiah; Saul needed to be seen as the greatest.

John only wanted to receive what God gave him; Saul wanted more than God gave him.

John was grateful for his part; Saul wanted someone else’s part.

John wanted to become lesser; Saul wanted to become greater.

It is so easy for us to attach this question to everyone and everything around us:

What does this mean about me?

If someone is complimented, what does that mean about me? If someone is told they are a great leader and I’m not told this, what does it imply about me? If we aren’t in a healthy place, we’ll think that compliments given to others mean that we are less than. But here’s the truth of what all these things mean about me: absolutely nothing.

What is present in someone else isn’t at all about what is absent in you.

If we need to know what we should keep our close eye on, think about this question:

What does God keep his close eye on?

When God tells Samuel to anoint the next king after Saul, he says it will be one of Jesse’s sons. When Samuel sees David’s brother Eliab, he thinks he has found the future king. It’s at this point God tells Samuel what he keeps his close eye on.

1 Samuel 16:7 But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

God doesn’t keep a close eye on what everyone else wants to compare. He sees through our appearances and the images we’ve created for ourselves. And he’s never comparing you and me to anyone else. He’s simply interested in whether or not we’re becoming who he created us to be and doing what he created us to do.

Each of us wants to be seen, which can cause all of us to live for the approval of others. I’m reminded of the story of Hagar. She is an Egyptian handmaiden to Sarai (later Sarah), Abraham’s wife. When Sarai realizes she can’t have children of her own, she gives Hagar to her husband. In the end, Sarai despises Hagar after she gets pregnant – even though this was Sarai’s idea. Hagar runs away and ends up encountering an angel sent by God. This encounter is so strong that Hagar gives God a title I want to share with you.

Genesis 16:13 She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.”

Have you seen the God who sees you? God sees you, even when others don’t. God approves of you, even when you don’t pass their test. God focuses his attention on you, even when the world ignores you. God calls you significant, even when everyone else considers you to be insignificant.

Knowing God sees you can free you from making sure everyone else does.

At the end of the day, God isn’t going to ask you how you ran my race. And he isn’t going to ask me how I ran yours. He’s going to hold me accountable for the life he had for me, and he’s going to hold you accountable for the life he had for you to live. God has a glorious life for you. Quit wishing you were someone else or had someone else’s talents. There’s only one you. What God desires and what the rest of this world needs is for you to do what God has graced you to do.